Persuade with Elegance
“Human subtlety will never devise an invention more beautiful, more simple, or more direct than does Nature, because in her inventions, nothing is lacking and nothing is superfluous.” –Leonardo da Vinci
When I was a younger man, just starting out in sales and life, I believed in raw ambition and brute force. I thought it’s my way or the highway. I wanted what I wanted when I wanted it and nothing was going to stop me from getting what I believed was mine. I thought that the real core behind powerful persuasion was hard work and conquering, dominating each and every situation. I know understand that this is all about domination and what I really understand about life is that instead of being in domination, the path to the real internal power is to be in dominion.
It is the nature of life to battle imaginary enemies at times. We’ve all tilted at windmills, all fought battles that are unwinnable, and the faster we learn that we are often the ones in our own way, in essence, that the enemy we are battling is ourself, then the faster we can advance to the next level. Why do we persist in doing something against our best interest? We’ve been entrenched, we have frames thrust upon us by school, family, society, et cetera, and these lessons were always taught through the lens of, work is hard, achievement comes through struggle’. I suggest that nothing could be farther from the truth.
For years I didn’t get that ‘struggling with my weight’ was keeping me stuck. The languaging was setting up a brick wall. Even the term ‘losing’ weight is a metaphorical minefield if you think about it. Who likes to lose? Loss is something we strive to avoid.
Living in dominion means we release all that struggle. Living in the now is the absolute most powerful way of living. This requires us to be totally present and accounted for. It means, no dwelling in the past over mistakes or ‘could of, should of, would of’s’, it means not thinking into the future of what might happen. It is instead concentrating on what you’re doing in the very moment you’re doing it. If you’re in the moment of selling a product or service to a potential prospect, be in that moment. That is the best way that moment can be used. Stop. Listen. Elicit. Get to know exactly what this person wants and needs at their very core.
It requires intention and attention and patience. You might not ‘get it’ right away. You might have a few future/past thoughts sneak back in or you might get stuck on thinking of times when you didn’t make the sale. Let these thoughts come and go, take a deep breath, and then consciously focus again on exactly what the person you are persuading is telling you.
It has changed my life incredibly for the better since I made the conscious decision to be present. Letting go of the struggle to control all possible outcomes and force things to my will has allowed me an inner peace that is indescribable. I highly recommend this way of living. It’s the very essence of elegant self persuasion.
Filed under: Business